|
|
|
October 4th, 2005
11:29 am
Hey guys! Well its been a long while since I have updated. Mostly because I am diggin myspace.com right now. But yeah, life has been pretty good to me sofar. I just started school yesterday...FINALLY! It was awsome (my first class was canceled). I also have the most amazing boyfriend i could ask for. Almost everyone knows my story: met at a museum, liked each other for two years, he saw me again and we started talking again) But pretty much Im really happy that we finally got to the point where we can be together with no worries. Every time I see him my stomache flips, my hands sweat, and my heart speeks like a race horse. Iver time theres something new we discover...and i love that. He definetly keeps m,e on my toes, and truth be told im falling pretty hard for him. Where it might go from here.. i dont know, but theres no place to go but up.
just wanted to let you guys in on that.
~Katie
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/loved.gif) loved
Current Music: My only one-yellowcard
|
June 27th, 2005
04:17 pm - I dont know what to do
Hey guys well this summer has been at its best sofar. Between working long hhours and hanging out with the gang right after work, im kind of beat. The other night we had a party for mandi where we drank and smoked cigarettes and watched a porn musical. It was fun. Then Saturday everyone came over after work and we attempted to go to south beach, party of it being my fault we got lost but i got messed up and we just headed south twards homestead. After a while we got twards downtown miami, everyone still freaking out cuz they thought we were lost, but i shut up and waws like.. im not sayin another word. I was feeling bad for getting us lost but that feeling went away when natasha edcided to take a short cut..hahahaha then she got us lost so the feelings were mutual now..lol. We got home safe and sound and on curfue, so itz all good.
I kind of had a breakdown today. I feel like i am trying to do so much between work (20h in the past two days)and trying to make everyone feel happy that i just realized that i am not at all happy. I sat in my room with my head in my hands crying like a baby silently because i feel like i dont belong. I feel like noone in my family cares about what I feel or that i dont want them invading my room using it as a daycare. For the first time in a while I am crying. The last time was a year ago when my godfather died, and before that when my grandfather died. I have been giving as much as i can right now. My paychecks go to my mom because i love the way she smiles when i treat her to lunch or offer to pay for her gas, and to my aunt for all the times she lent me money for prom homecomming and so on (current balance $500) Earlier when i was taping the walls with blue painters tape for the painting were doing in my cousins room, i began to cry because i feel like this isnt my home anymore, and i remember the things my aunt says about me paying rent and so on and think to myself "do they really think i wouldnt give the world to be living with my mom?" Its so hard not to be able to. I miss having a home with her and knowing that she wouldnt make me feel unwanted. The worste part is that i cant cry on anyones shoulder because everytime i do they look at me like im ungreatful and selfish.
I dont know what to do.
~katie
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/sad.gif) guilty
Current Music: Dashboard confessionals: Bitter pill
|
June 10th, 2005
04:37 pm - I miss you guys
Hey guys! IM A COLLEGE FRESHMAN! Oh my god it is so funny because I have been getting used to callin the Art Institute my "school" and the other day I went there and did some paper work, saw some hott ners in the computer labs and loitered, and afterwards my little cousin proved to me that there is nothing that can take the place of my high school:
Natie: Ilove Arizona tea
Me: Um okay!
Natie: At your school theres a ton of vending machines with them and good food.
Me (all excited and sort of shocked): When did you go to Everglades!
Later I found out she meant the art institute guys....:( I already miss the crew! I want to cry...we aint kids no mo.
Well guys before I start to get even more sappy and home sick, I will say later.
~Katiela
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/silly.gif) weird
Current Music: Plain white T's- Hey There Delila (hey christy I got the CD)
|
May 27th, 2005
01:23 pm
I AM DONE.
Cap and Gown (check)
Finished school (check)
Got a job (check)
Money (check)
Awsomeness guys. Lets go out and get drunk.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/happy.gif) ecstatic
Current Music: Jessica SImpson- in this skin
|
May 20th, 2005
07:06 pm
Hey guys...yeah i know it's been forever since I have updated. SO since a few people out there want me to write... here it goes.
Well I finished my autobiography for Ms.Brown...who although thought it was a "great read" thinks that i am in danger of harming myself....go figure! Then there is my other classes, fashion/marketing, and the almighty Mr.G's class...he said that its rediculous that i have missed 22 days in his class. So i havent missed a day since last wednesday! I even cameto school on monday just durring 4th period! That was fun! Other than that...i hope my graduation plans are gravy...wouldnt it suck if i didnt graduate? I dunno...this seems a little too good to be true. I feel like its happening so easily so i figure that there will be some sort of catch before graduation that i'll have to go through. WHat... i dont know but iguess im ready for it.
Work is the pits. I go in, fight with pregnate ladies who want decafe shit that we dont make because we arent a big starbucks, and tell her that if she doesnt buy anything it doesnt harm me so i dont care. But hey at least the people are cool. I work with a few hotties. Theres Jose, a mexican frat boy who has nice eyes and like MILFs. Then Oscar, a latin dude whos 18 and super cute, thats all i know but i'd do him. Then theres Federico, woh everyone knows...and i swear he doesnt know that hes oht so every once and a while i remind him by letting him know that he has a fan club of like sophmores and freshmen around the school...yea guys when he gets famouse were getting married and snuggling. Then theres some randome people around Target...you guys have seen then, they are adorable. But yea thats work for you. Besides that everyday talk about mothers who talk on their cell phones and their kids get kidnapped because they were running around like monkeys, and looking at breast reduction scars, i think were pretty much good! I keep getting calls from then cuz they want me to work, but shit man its my week off!
Now at home its okay, everyone still sucks ass, i cant wait to start school because then i have a reason to leave home! Truthfully, i want to date a hott guy training to be a cheff at the Johnson and Whales University right next to Ai miami. Can you imagine all the sweet luvin we'd make ? Wow.
SO yea Mandi and i made a deal, we both are losing our virginity this summer. Any offers?..lol..okay not that easily but its our mission... Shelly your in on it too..... (:O) Well im bored so i'll go now
later lil niggas!
~Kat
Current Mood: devious
Current Music: Lots of tunes
|
May 3rd, 2005
09:43 pm
Um...like..oh my god guys.
Hows it freakin going?
Well prom was funny. Of course the meat squad won stuff...but hey they deserve it cuz like they are the spirit team of the f-ing class, and who else do we remember for most of that stuff?
Some chick was complaining cuz it wasnt fair that Naiomi won homecomming and prom queen...um apparently it is because more people like her, so i think it is fare...suckas!
Well, besides that, i like watching drunk high school girls durring prom.. HI-LARIOUS! Some people just cant hold their liqure.
ANyways...got some pics...just ask...enjoy!...
P.s. is it just me or are you freakin eager to leave this damb school already?
~Kat
Current Mood: crazy
Current Music: Peppers Ghoste
|
April 16th, 2005
12:36 pm
Hey guys. Well i have come to see that reality strikes us when we least expect it. Yesterday two guys from our school passed away in a car crash, like you all know already, and everyone has been mourning for their deaths. Suddenly we all dont feel like complaining about the little things in our lives that we continuously complain about. Personaly, i didnt know them. Maybe i have passed by them in the hallways, but other than that they were just strangers to me. The fact is that when it happend on our turf, we feel as if it could have happened to anyone. Now we think about the chances we take, and the risk we put ourselves through, and appreciate that we are living even more. I feel bad for them because they would never be able to graduate, go to college, hang out with their friends, argue with their parents about the little tyhings that we all get angry about. There wont be any more parties or concerts for then or phonecalls from someone they like, and no more waking up earlyto go to Everglades and count down the minutes till the bell rings. I bet they will be missed. Rest in peace guys.
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/calm.gif) calm
Current Music: Untitled- Simple Plan
|
April 10th, 2005
02:28 pm
Hey dudes. Well yesterday rocked. I chilled at home and afterwards went to watch Ms. Ashlee SImpson at the Pompano Ampetheature. It was so freakin amazing guys! TO all you guys who say she sucks i just want to tell you to SUCK IT! SHe was awsome...definetly no lip singing. Plus the bands that played before her was awsome! The Click Five are a definet must have when their CD comes out this summer. Then there Peppers Ghost, they are from Philly, which explains the way they hump stages (sorry thats not how we do it here in Florida) and lacked tans... good thing they came here! Well, After being squashed in a mosh pit...christie and i went back to our seats but then got beer spilt on us by some lady dancing on the chairs. All in all it was awsome! We at taco bell afterwards... i was so hungry! But anyways I definetly have to go to another concert soon. Warped Tour is comming up, and so is the y-100.7 summer jam thingy. Simpl Plan is going guys.. that means katie would do anything to get to see/ meet/bang them... or Pierre only would be great...you know. LOL.
Well I have to go to Target and find out why they havent called me back about when i start working....I know for sure i did not fail that drug test. I am like the freakin Virgin Mary, never goin anything wrong. SO yeah, guys i guess ill go and live another day in the life of Katie and try sorting out a little of my confusion. Later luvs
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/confused.gif) confused
Current Music: Dashboards Confessionals
|
April 7th, 2005
04:53 pm
Simple Plan - EVerytime
It was three AM when you woke me up
And we jumped in the car and drove as far as we could go
Just to get away
We talked about our lives
Until the sun came up
And now I'm thinking about
How I wish I could go back
Just for one more day
One more day with you
Everytime I see your face
Everytime you look my way
It's like it all falls into place
And everything feels right
Ever since you walked away
You left my life in disarray
All I want is one more day
All I need is one more day with you
When the car broke down
We just kept walkin along
Til we hit this town
There was nothing there at all
But that was all okay
We spent all our money on stupid things
But if I looked back now, I'd probably give it all away
Just for one more day
One more day with you
Everytime I see your face
Everytime you look my way
It's like it all falls into place
Everything feels right
Ever since you walked away
My life's been in disarray
All I need is one more day with you
Now I'm sittin here, like we used to do
I think about my life and how now there's nothing I won't do
Just for one more day
One more day with you
Everytime I see your face
Everytime you look my way
It's like it all falls into place
Everything feels right (Everything feels right)
Everytime I hear your name
Everytime I feel the same
It's like it all falls into place
Everything feels right
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: Simple Plan
|
March 24th, 2005
05:43 pm
Hey dudes I saw ice princess yesterday!it was so cute! Since there was practically nobody in the theature pam ren and i decided to be loud. We were so infatuated with the guy that the girl likes. Hotness. Well anyways...we were all stressed and stuff so we smoked a few cigarettes by rens are and i freaked out in the middle of the movie because I thought I reeked of it. When we walked back to the car i saw one of those weird box looking cars parked and told pam how i like them but they are so f-ing ugly...but then two heads pop out the window as we walked by....oops! Laren told her mom she was going home but instead we hung out at pams. Then her mom called her yelling and we had to hawl it out of the house and sped down pembroke road to get home ion three minutes flat. Awsomeness. All in all its been kinda slow today. Planing to go to Opa tonight so if anyone wants to meet up.. call and we might be at hollywood or ft.lauderdale.
Later
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/dorknerdy.gif) dorky
Current Music: i dunno
|
March 22nd, 2005
08:48 pm
Hey guys whats up? Well I have been spending spring break to the fullest...ant that the truth. Pam practically moved in and spent most of the time here at the pool and eating...lol. The other night I went out with a few "friends" but i kind of wish I wasnt so carefree cuz now i kind of feel bad :( But anyways, i cant wait till graduation. I cant help but think about the past few years. I have changed soooo freakin much its kind of interesting, but then again some things never change. I used to do stupide things and now wish i never did before because they only come back to bite me in the ass by people I thought changed. Truthfully they dont. EVeryone thinks the same way as they once did, react the same and handle situations like they always have. The only sad part is that we never learn from our mistakes. Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice chame on me. I always look at the better side of a persons heart, but then when history continues to repeat itself and I get tired and worn out from the crap going on I realize that I never really saw what was in that persons heart and never knew what really went through their mind. This sounds sad and strange, but no matter how well you know a person you never know what their true intentions are. You never know how they really think of you and if you could really trust them. Is it worth sacrificing your feelings and ego to have something studide given in return? I dont think so. Well ali is on her way home and I am kind of pissed because I waisted my day at home because I thought I had to babysit. Later dudes ~Kat ( nice girls finish last )
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/stressed.gif) stressed
Current Music: Maria Mena : Just a little bit
|
March 19th, 2005
04:16 pm
OMG guys! I signe up to Myspace.com to talk with a few of my friends, and like this guy tells me he wants to be my buddy and for me to call him and he freaked when i told him no because I am not into that online stuff. Look what he told me:
well to me...e mail chat is much more awkward than real talk and I don't talk with ummms and uhhhs.
you said that you aren't into talking on the phone until you know me better. well how are you going to get to know me better by text messages? Can you tell what my personality is like by reading my e mails? Can you tell if I talk fast or slow? Can you tell if I'm hyper or easy going?
Can you tell if I have a high pitched voice or a soft spoken voice?
The truth is.....the only real way to get to know someone is to verbalize. That's the only true way of knowing what someone is like. Until we talk on the phone I'm a big mystery and so are you.
You're just making exuse to avoid the phone. Admit it, You're just a chicken shit that hides behind the comfort of your PC because you don't want to deal with reality so you make an exuse about the dangers of meeting people over the internet.
You're such a lame ass Kat.
you're a real let down - what a drag....and I thought you were an open minded go with the flow kewl chick.
but it turns out that you are very uptight and narrow minded.....very un kewl.
Kenny
This is what I told him:
okay, i signed up to this thing no to meet new people and have friends to talk with, just for fun. So if im not into talking on the phone with you now, its not because im a chicken shit, its because im not interested in doing so. Im not a lame ass, kenny, you are. I may not know you, but you dont know me either. YOu think im uptight but im not, i just dont give a damb. Your so not cool, so untill you realize that not everyone wants to talk wih you , then there going to think that your the uptight stuborn ass, like I think so already.
Later
~Kat
Wow some people need to take the stick out of their ass.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/amused.gif) amused
Current Music: Some asian dude
|
March 8th, 2005
06:46 pm
DUde I just checked out my old web page I have here at live journal.. man does it look old!!! From old pictures of mewhen I was 15 (me now being 18) to old guys...no pun intended...and friends. Time has passed so quickly its not even funny! Then it gets me thinking... I wish somethings were like they used to be.....
Ponder
trying to win maroon 5 tickets!!!!
~Katie
|
March 6th, 2005
01:12 pm - 18
Yes guys I lived to be 18! Well let me tell you...it has been awsome so far! Friday night I went with l afamilia to Taverna Opa....a greek returant where you dance on tables and party, and I took so many pictures! I had a blast....danced with a waitor who when I looked at when we were dancing would have this expression on his face as if he were having sex....so funny. SO i called lauren when I got home and we made plans to go out with people to Tavernao opa staurday. I went to teh mall with mom ran into mandi at Muvio...go figure...and called everyone else when I got home to see if they wanted to go too. So we said we would leave at 8 but left at 9...cuban time... and had a blast the entire night! On the day down to Opa...christy Lauren and I were so freakin hyped talking a mile a minute and dancing life freaks in the car. Once we got there we were shoved at this tiny table for four and danced on it. We dropped a glass and took a ton o picture! After a hwile the waitress was like...foods here sit! I was like UMMM NO!!!! So i kept dancing and this waitor grabbe dme and told me to dance on the bar! Sooooo... I DID! It was funny because everyone wa swatching me and the gange was freakin out!!! HAHAHA bobby came onto the bar with me and was dancing slow..him being greek and all..I thought I was dancing wrong..lol. SO i just wiggled my little bottom and shimmied till the sirrens went off and climed down to eat. WHen we had to pay the wiatress gave us a problem because she wanted a huge ass tip.... after telling us that if we dont each spend $15 we have to finish and leave the table to find somewhere else to dance. WHATEVER! NO TIP FOR HER! just kidding we gave her like a six or seven dollar tip but she wanted more...I DONT THINK SO! Bobby got pissed because he talked to the manager about it and when he said his sister had worked there so he knows how thing work the manager told him his stser hadnot worked there since forever! HELL NO! So we just walked outside...Mandi Naty and Bobby had to go, and Lauren Christy and I decided to stay for one more dance. SO we stand by the DJ and I decide "im going to dance!" and I do. Then this old man tells me I could hance on his table...and I do...and I start dancing with this thrity something year old woman who was so adorable because she was shimming!..lol.. but anyways, christy and ren joined in and when I looked down the old men were staring up my skirt!(shorts included)! Five minutes later one of the old men migrated twards christy and was petting her leg! and the waitor I danced with the night before was dancing in front of lauren! After a while we migrated to several different tables and did our thing.... man we were party animals... them when the place died down....so did our energy. We Left at around 12:30 and were so hyped up! I called home and Tommy was telling ALi to check my breath when I came home.... which wouldnt be good because i smelled like greek people. In the end the night was a success. Total awsomeness! Chrity!!!! we so have to go out again! If it were up to you and me we would have stayed untill closing! SPring Break!
Opa dudes!
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/working.gif) accomplished
Current Music: ummm i dont know!
|
February 15th, 2005
10:24 pm
Heyguys! Well you know what? I got accepted to one college. My bacck up Johnson and Whales university sent me a gynormouse packet of stuff to sign...I guess this is why freshmen drop out of their first year, they give up after just applying. Mom has just sent out the IFAC application, I hope I get in.. SO NERVOUS!!!! WHy the hell does it take so long to get your application checked? I mean... read the essay, review the grades, compair to some other dude (hopefully he makes me look good) and slam my paper with a giant ACCEPTED stamp across the page. I applied to FIT over a month ago and still havent gotten any word from them. I kinda wish I applied to a few more schools.
My godmother is comming to town this saturday! I was told the mission she and my aunt went threw when getting the train tickets. I thought it was hillarious, so I want to tell you:
Tia Maria (aka my Godma) and Tia AIda went to the train station to trade in a pair of train tickets they had bought a few omnths ago for a new set. WHile waiting in line, Tia Aida decided to whip out her miny TV and watch her soap opera as she ate crackers on a seat. Tia Maria told AIda to hold onto the tickets while she went to get something. WHen they were ready to leave, they began arguing and Tia Aida picked up her back of crackers and "trash" and threw it down the trash despensor. As they were leaving the station Tia Maria asked Tia Aida wher ethe tickets were... Both their mouths dropped as they turned around to the trash shoot and freake dout when they noticed what they had just thrown away. Tia Maria spazed out because they threw away the tickets, Tia Aida had a panic attack because she threw away her TV. The called the janitor to let them into the trash room to search for their things. AIda hopped into the junk as more trash was dropping in, and tia Maria stood to the side and said "Are you crazy? There is no chance in hell I am getting in there." The janitor found their tickets and TV and as they left he laughed and told them "That is what you get for being a pain in the ass!"
This sooo reminded me of Lavern and Shirley or something! I could not stop cracking up. The only thing you guys dont know is that they were up in NYC wearing their fur coats that made them look like grizzleys and have the traditional helmet hair all cuban women wear.
I love my family! Valentines day was ot so bad because I know it is no big deal. its great if you have someone...but you get to have fun with your friends if you dont. There is no way you can be alone. Abu got me a kick out planner/diary. It has this spaniard girl on it and her name is Pascualina. I cant stop saying her name. I think it rocks yo!!!! Imma name my first born that...even if they get beat up for it. Well I have to go now. I am actually babysitting tonight...which means it is going to be a while untill i get picked up. Hey that gives me time to write my autobiography!
See ya DuDeS!
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/lazyrelaxed.gif) apathetic
Current Music: what does apathetic mean?
|
February 7th, 2005
04:56 pm
Hey guys. Well I have been busy the past few weeks.
First off, like I said last, I cut my hair. Those who know me can majorly tell that it is SHORT. But I can work it.
Well, we had playfest last thursday and friday. Like always, my grandmother fell in love with Luis and his pretty long hair, and Todd, the one and only Hamlet. Do you know what my fear was all throughout districts? I was scared that I would ride the bike across stage, and fall centerstage................ it happened on friday. OMGGGG!!!! I was so feakin embarassed! Right before my cue, Lyssa asked if i had told tracy to fill the front tire, which was flat...and i did not get taken care of, and then told me to slow down as I ride. I screamed as I glided onstage, and about a foot away from the side curtain, my bike tipped over, leaving me pannicked, and crawling off stage. Melissa saved the day cuz she dragged the bike off stage, and I left with a bloody knee. How is it that I get hurt every night!
I have been diagnosed with being accident prone. I went to the mall the other day with adri, and I kept knocking everything down! Did I walk under a ladder? Well, on Saturday I went to little nickeys soccer game...they lost...so I called Pam to see if she wanted to go out later on. We met at her house and just hung out for a while... I dont think we have laughed like that in soooo long. Thank god her mom loves me because she actually let pam stay the night at my house. We planned out what we wanted to do for our graduation party. We are such birds because we forgot that graduation starts at 3 and ends at 5...so our party would starts at nightime. Well all I can say is that anyone who is anticipated to go will think it is sooo pretty.
I finally fixed my essay for college. I almost mailed it out without letting mamila read it...which was a good thing she did cuz I messed up sooooo much. But hey thats what I do...im accident prone remember?
I was talking to pam the other day and she told me about something she has been thinking about. She was like"man katie needs a boyfriend because she is so pretty and blah blah blahblah." then she came to the conclusion that I really dont need a boyfriend because im the type of girl who just likes having fun. Which is so true. I really have never been so boy crazy and completely jelouse over everyone who has someone. Im actually too busy...still!!! Then she said once i get into college i am so going to drive the boys crazy...because we all know I attract the older fellas. HAHAHA. Okay, I am actually tired of typing. Anyone wants to go out after school this week (FCATS so im skipping tuesday) give me a call.
Love
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/embarrassed.gif) embarrassed
Current Music: Ryan Cabrera
|
February 2nd, 2005
08:28 pm
I cut my hair. It is short. Show tomarrow. I am in it. Starts at 7pm and is 5 bucks for enterance. See you there and if your not there you are so square.
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/exhausted.gif) drained
Current Music: Im through with you- maroon 4
|
January 26th, 2005
06:23 pm
Hey guys hows it hangin? Well I made it this week attending school every morning...except Monday. After we shot the Senior Panoramic, the dude ho was telling us about the senior package said "Is Katherine Gonzalez in the house? You have to go to the front office." Every senior there who knows me, know that I was leaving...like always! Thats a priceless memory I will always have. HAHAHA! Okay... so heres what is going on. Pam and I are talking more, plans this Saturday afternoon. Lauren and I have to rehers for Final Dress Rehersal (which means I have to buy those ugly shorts again cuz I already returned them) and I need to get a physical so I can try out for tennis team next Monday. Ew! Mr C's buldge in his tiny white shorts!!!! Thats one crotch I so dont want to stare at. Saturday night I am supposed to go to a couple of parties (a reason to wear the little black dress I bought with pam and luren!). I went to the church I grew up in last Sunday. I saw Father Albert Cutie. He looks like Ben AFlect. OMG can you imagine if ben became a preiest? Well, I went up to get my communion and he had a giant smile on his face. the other priest was talking and father cutie was leaning over his chair talking to my mom and pointing at me making large hand movements intending that I have grown soooooo much. After mass ended he couldnt wait to tell me the most beautiful words ever, " Look at you Boogerina! Just the other day you were just a booger now you have gotten so big!" WOW! HAHAHA. Only me guys. I notice that graduatuation is creeping up on us Seniors. With that said I just want to say a few thing: High school isnt about getting you prepaired for college(yeah it is but keep reading) its about you growing up. Its the time you have to find yourself and figure out who you want to be. You dont have to be the loner, the misfit, the goth, the prep, the jock, the dancer, the slut, the emo, or anything you dont want to be. Just recently I discovered that a great friend of mine has been feeling down about everything, somethings she peobably doesnt even know why for, but the fact is, shes sad. You dont have to feel like this if you dont want to. Everyone, even I do, gets depressed. Its just the way you express yourself that gets you through it all. If you dont want to cut yourself anymore, you dont have to. You dont have to hurt yourself because it doesnt help you in the long run. Its like midol when you have cramps. It works for a while but is just a pice of shit in the end. Dont feel bad that you did it, just remember that no one, not your parent, therapist, boyfriend, or friends can make you stop. Only you can. I love you!!!! Okay... moving on. Rivalry is just a way for us to excuse ourselves from being friends you dont want to be with, or covering your ass when you feel threatened. No one if actually out to get you no matter what you thing. That person you think sends you to hell ever time you walk down the hall, could give two shits about you. As much as you love your friends/boyfriends/teachers/family, in the long run it is only you. No one will be there when you have a problem to bail you out except you. Stop worrying what the future will be like and just go with it. Life is a little less painful that way. Dating isnt all its cracked up to be. TRUST ME. I have spend four years being somewhat boy crazy, and right now I could care less if I had a boyfriend (except for prom. Im accepting offers now) I have been told by sooo many people the same thing "oh your so pretty why dont you have a bf, you deserve one." OMG seriously should I take that offensive or as a compliment? I really dont need a boyfriend, I have survived without one, so I think I can manage till the time is right. When your mean to others, karma will come back to kick you in the ass (at least I hope it does do so to that girl who threw her gum in my hair yesterday.) And last but not least, get over it. That is what senior year is. I know im completely over it all! The rumors, the stupide pressure and the teachers who treat us as if we were ideots. Im ready to do my own thing. I hope you are too. I know that high school did live up to be as they say it is in the movies (painful) but thats what growing up is all about.
Take care lil niggas.
~Kat
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: Rugrats
|
January 21st, 2005
10:07 am
http://photos.yahoo.com/ph//my_photos
Hey guys... just figured out a way to get the pictures here. Here are some randome outings we have gone n since '03.
~Kat
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: clicking of typer thingys...Oh keyboards.
|
January 20th, 2005
03:44 am
Live journal S-U-C-K-S! I had already typed up a massive amount of stuff and it erased. Well here we go again.
Yesterday was districts and well, we lost. Upper, i dont hav eto pay 250 to go to states. Downer, I wanted to win. Well i figured we wouldnt because we only had a week and a half to reherse and everyone else had a year. That plus the mega bad vibes we were getting because everyone was saying that we would mess up and blah blah WHAAAA. I played miss mary sunshine untill after the cerimoney. When the instructor tole up the clock was ticking, We headed to the dressing room where i got dresses ad the messenger girl (but looked more like a camp counsler from Camp OANaWaNa) and helped everyone get ready. We headed to the stage where I prayed I wouldnt fall, trip, or mess up my lines as I stared at my bike. I rushed on the stage when I heard my cue and was ready to say my lines. I was sure I was going to do good,but the Louise completely ran over my line! I was sooo pissed. I sat back down to play it off. After I exited, I set up for my next scene. I hopped onto the bike, put my ball cap on, and then couldnt kick the bike stand up. It was rusted stuck! I had spent ten mintues trying to unstuckify it, as I imagined myself riding across stage, the bike stopping midway and me toppling over, then I heard my cue and just gave myself a big push. I glided across stage and screamed (I was supposed to) then crashed. Then I stummbled out from behind the curtains, twarled behind the door and fell on my ass (I wasnnt supposed to do that) which added a little somethiong extra to it. After mym part I got up and was pissed and ready to go. We were awarded an Exelent, Outstanding Teching, and Lisa was awarded outstanging female actress. Then I realized my charm was missing and thats when the perky me went out the door.
I didnt go to school today becaus emom had to go to a business meeting for the day and needed me to watch Nat and Jake. I avoided Jennys calls because I knew what would happen if I answered. Then she appeared at the door. She did the usual, used the computer, use the phone, ask me to do her hair, and then she told me that she was going to leave Zoey. I had 3 days worth of honors HW to do, and seriously cant keep an eye on my hyperactive niece who I seriously adore. She freaked out and told me she had stuff to do, so I told her that it was fine, but next time call me instead of mom to ask if its okay because I am the one who watched her. Who here thinks thats inconsiderate? Well thats when gthe can of worms were opened, she calle dme an ass hole, i told her to just make sure she comes back because last week she dissapeared for 5 day and never called once. She fed me this story about her fan belt snapping and she had to get the tow truck an to gether,l but could you not have asked to use a phone... or a pay phone. Wait get it all the pay phones in miami were out of service along with 1800-collect! Thats reasonable! She pushed me against the wayy and "threatened to punch my face in" which i found not one bit threatening froma five foot tall chick who wants me to babysit her kid.
She went to the kitchen to use the phone and call mom...which was sooooo not good, so i told mom to hang up and go to the meating she had to be ontime for. Jen got even more pissed off. She told me to get the fuck out of MY ROOM! I dont think sooooooo! Thats when i started getting upset. Jake and Natie were crying because they were scared jen would start swinging any minute now, and Zoey was crying on the table. I told her to grow up because se is 21 and there are going to be people inthe world who are going to tell her things she hates, and that the baby obviously didnt like what wa sgoing on. Then she hit me with one of the hardest brickes ever (not literally). She starte acting like she did when she was 13 and told me that Zoey cant even stand me and I was never going to be her godmother in the first place. Thats when I started screaming back. Im the one who is fucking24/7 with HER daughter and takes care of he rand watched her back. IM selfish? I dont think so! ANd I never even believed I was going to be the godmother, especially when she told half of miami they were her godparents. I dont even believe half the shit that comes out of her mouth. She got in my face again and I warned her to stop.
*QUICK SERVEY: If your older sibling who the last time you actually fist fought with them and meant it was when you just started puberty, started etting inyour face and cursing yo out...would you get pissed?
I told her to get out. I told her over and over and over again. Im sorry If I was getting ina fight at someones house and cursed them out.. I would get the hell out of there ASAP! But thats Jennifer Marie Gonzalez for you guys!
She told me how I was selfish and fucked everyone over and that she has had it worste than I do, to the point where she had to get pregnant at 17 to get out of it all. I laughed and yelled back to get over it bacuse that was her decission and that no normal person would think that the only way out of a house, where all she did was homework, take care of a baby for two hourse, and get everythng else she wanted, was the only way out of a house. Shit man shes right. Im not her and i havent been through what shes gone through and im SO GLAD!!!! I havent. In case she hasnt noticed, her life is a shit hole where no one believs a word she says because she has grown to be a pathological lier! The last time we got in a fight like this was 2 years ago. I confonted her because she was stealing my clothes, after she already had permission to use ity, and she formed the same show.
I cryed a fountain when she left. Not because we fought, got knows everything I told her needed to be said, but because now she will continue to raise my niece, who after a while could be the most preciouse thing in the world, how to act just like her. She swares, hits, looks grungy, and always looks as if she needs to eat, but thats because shes naturally skinny. I love her with all my heart and only want the best for her, but with her mom fucking around with her as if she was a toy, what goes around will come around because she will treat her mother the way her mother treated hers, and so on.
Note to all you 21 year old mothers who think the world is aginst you. Shut up when someone who helps you asks you to cut them some slack. It will only benifit you.
~Kat
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/sick.gif) nauseated
Current Music: Your so Vain
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
katieluv0405's journal